Stuff to know

Monday, October 28, 2013

I wrote a bunch of stuff yesterday  on thinking, 
and  before you get preconceived notions
That I’m some kind of  “think good –good always happens”
or some name it and claim it theology.
Let me be clear about my process. 

Any thought worth thinking has to meet certain criteria for me.
So you might want to think on that a bit.
What standards are you  going to set for your  thinking?

You get to decide
You get to be the gatekeeper to the door of your mind.
That is a gift.
Use it wisely.

For me the standards of my mind have to meet 3 criteria:

  1. It must be true
  2. It must be positive
  3. It has to teach me.

 For a thought to be  true some would say is subjective.
So pick your subject of truth.

I am lover of God and follower of Jesus.
Every word that God has spoken is true.
If the thoughts about the situation don’t match God's  thoughts
They shouldn't make it into my thoughts.

Can we really just decide not to think our way
and trust His even when there seems  to be no visible evidence to do so?

Let the wicked forsake their ways
and the unrighteous their thoughts.’
Isaiah 55 says yes.

You can forsake your own thoughts!!
 Yeah this is good news!

I can reject that thought of popping my child’s head off like a Pez dispenser
when she rolls her eyes at me.

 Or the random thought of
“Why are we married?’ when my husbands tracks mud
 all over the newly mopped floor.

Yes this is good news indeed!!  For all concerned.
( And if your concerned that in the above scripture You would be the unrighteous,
just get over it – because that’s all of us)

At the very least even if the thought made it into the foyer of my mind-
the brakes of forsaking were applied and it never became cemented in the basement,
( which by the way is next to the front door of the mouth- more on that later.)

So today’s assignment: FORSAKE AWAY

Don’t want that thought- Forsake it

Untrue thought  coming your way -Forsake it

If you live in Jersey – Forget About it
You see my point.

You do not have to entertain every thought that comes into your mental realm
Weather you thought it , read it , or heard it. You get to decide weather or not to keep it

 Take it from a person with OCD this is a huge.
 Hard but Huge.

According to Webster forsake means to renounce or turn away form entirely.
 Another definition is to abandon. 

That doesn't leave ANY wiggle room to keep that thought hanging around in the back of your mind.

This isn't a stiff upper lip thing.
I’ll  make the best of it.
I’ll just  keep this dung heap of a thought but put a glittery bow on it.

NO its got to go.
Abandon it
Forsake it and Forge ahead.

Because there are better thoughts to think.

Saturday, October 26, 2013

I've Been Thinking

I have been thinking lately a lot about thinking.
  It seems everywhere I turn I am receiving messages about thinking.
 Messages of hope and encouragement.
And messages of rebuke and action. 
 I have OCD and I suspect a touch of ADD,
ask any friend of mine they will whole heartedly affirm this! J

And at the risk of sounding prideful or crazy
I have at one time or another thought I could be a genius or a lunatic.
See I have the gift/curse of being able to have two or more thoughts at once.
 Not just half a thought or scattered thoughts but complete thoughts at the same time.

No there are no audible voices or multiple personalities (that’s just my hormones).
And at times it’s great I am free flowing with creativity.
I can’t write an idea fast enough or get my hands on something as quick as possible.
 I often can not express a thought without stuttering because I’m already onto the next one. Other times it is just maddening.

 Especially when the thoughts are negative, uncomfortable and untrue. 
You know which ones.
 We have all had them .
 Insecure thoughts.
Unkind thoughts.
Fearful thoughts.
 And when those thoughts run wild and pile one on top of another I just want to scream . It is a mental wrestling match.

And at that point taking a nap is my best ally. 
I literally want to be unconscious and NOT THINK.
  Maybe this is a reason why some turn to the bottle or the drug or anything else that deconstructs them as a person.
I can see the temptation for escape.
 I just nap and while its not heroine.
 Its still an idol.

Sleep helps my exhausted mind-
heck if my body would workout as much as my mind
I would be the best paid supermodel and most decorated Olympian all in one.

So  I want to begin a series on the topic of thinking.
Since not thinking is not an option ( and who really wants that option anyway)
  Logically (there goes that thinking again) it makes sense to deal with the content of thinking and the control we have been given over that.

What shapes our thinking?
 Why do we think the way we do and should we?
Why do we think a certain way and why do we continue to do so?
Can I change my thinking?
 And what will that look like in my life?

The answer to the last questions I have  answers in the form of a proverb

As a man (women) thinks, so he is.
Prov 23:7

Let’s paraphrase this for ourselves

As a woman thinks, so she is.

Let’s personalize this

As I think, so I am,
As you think, so you are

Now put your name here

As_______thinks, so she is.

Yes lets get started thinking ourselves into who we are.
If your not there yet, no problem.

You are about to think yourself into who you want to be.

Friday, October 25, 2013


A throwback Thursday

The sun is just beginning to peak over the trees this morning of our big mountain trip.
It seems like we have been planning this forever.
 This is our first grown up all-by-ourselves vacation
(Minus the weekend get away at camp) since we have been married.
Once every 14 years I say!!
We are not taking relatives.
We are not visiting relatives. 
We are just traveling just the 5 of us to an adventure through the smoky mountains.

Going to sleep in a real live hotel!!! Whoo hoo!!
Now some of you may be thinking this is way overdue
Yes… Yes  it is. But it was either this or the bills that had to be overdue.

So bills are paid and we are off.
It is possible we will be close to broke,
as in no liquid assists for a while,
when we get home but we will be mountainside!!!
And by that I mean we may have to become
 mountaineers and live off the land as we drain the savings.

But in the words of Scarlett O Hara:
 “Ill worry about that tomorrow (or next month)

At 5 a.m. the alarm went off and our oldest was already up and ready to fly out the door. 
I on the other hand was just stumbling to the kitchen to the coffee pot.

Thank goodness Marc had set it all up the night before
 and all I had to do was push a button.

Some of my worst mornings have come when Marc fails
 to complete this step as part of his nightly routine

In this event I usually find myself fiddling with the filters,
and trying not to have a heart attack as the grinder pulverizes the beans into dust.
 Then I half  hazardly pour the water into a two inch opening while my left eye attempts to twitch open.

As I stare into space awaiting the 3 beeps
that signal caffeine completion my pulse begins to recover from
the bean mutilation machine
I am still in such a state of confusion that I fail
 to notice the enormity of coffee grounds in my coffee cup.

But as I sip my already prepped coffee this morning
 I am somewhat perky and excited about our road trip.
  I hear a slight stirring in the next room and
 I assume it is Mr. Rodgers and go to greet him.

However it is not Mr. Rodgers

It is in fact the largest horsefly in North America.
If you have never had the pleasure of seeing a southern horsefly you are blessed.
I believe they are the Alabamian curse for participation in the confederacy.
They arrive every May and the BITE

The only relief comes when the dragonflies swoon in 3 weeks later to devour the beasts.
Ahhhh circle of life.

The only thing worse I have ever experienced came in the summer of 2000
when the 17 year locusts came out in literal Biblical proportions. 
But that’s another story.

I guess each region has its own quirks. 
Once Mr. Rodgers came back from South Carolina
 with his legs all bitten up from some critter.

“What in the world got you “I asked?
“I don’t know I never saw them”
“Excuse me?’

“Really, I asked the local boys what the heck was making me itch so badly because I couldn’t see them.’
“They all replied ‘We know and they will eat you up.’”
I told them “I obviously knew that but what –are-they-called?”(Silly south Carloiners)
They said “Noseeums”

Now wanting to engage in intellectual dialogue at all times
and being blonder than I pay to be I replied:
“Oh is that Lithuanian?”

My husband just shook his head very slowly and said
“They are called “NO-SEE-UMS” because you don’t see um!!”

Oh got it.
Gotta love local flavor.
  Wonder what lexical wonders we will encounter in the mountains?”

What do you have from your neck of the woods?
Provide definitions please!!

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

The Spectrum of Joy

Living in Estrogenville is always eventful. 
All three of my girls are different from one another. 
They look different and they all have drastically different personalities.
Their reactions are vastly different.

Take for instance a simple remark made at separate occasions 
to Happy Mouth (who will be receiving a new alias soon), 
Laid Back Jane and Forrest.  

Something as simple as " Have you finished your chores?' 
 can be met will a spectrum of (over)reactions.

Of course there is the all time favorite of "Yes, Moooom" 
accompanied by an eye roll. 
But this doesn't happen too often 
since eye roll=hard labor. 

 Really any body language offense will land you in the pool of 
"Mom's least favorite chores are now yours."   
One year Happy Mouth was unable to control herself so much that
 I had the cleanest kitchen on the Eastern Shore; all the way down to the grout.

Seriously it was bad.
Friends would call and ask me to send her their way 
when she met her quota at my house .

Other times a reaction of "Yes ma'am"  comes and not only was respect shown
 but the chore was actually done well. 
 These are fun ,fun, times . 
Rare but fun.

Then there is the high octane estrogen response.
 It goes something like this:

"Uggh" (no eye roll here because they are shut tight)
" I can' t believe all you care about is chores, when my entire existence is at stake. 
I mean my whole life is about to implode!! And do you care at all?'

Now over the years I have learned that this response is designed to distract. 
And while I have fallen for it before ,
 my years of training have now made me a Master Rebound Reactor.

I know just respond to this drama with a cool
" You are fine and unless you would actually like me to rip
 your world apart by the seams I suggest you get your tail in motion ."

They usually just stare at me
 like I am the most compassion-less human 
that ever existed , and do their chores.
I' m good with that.

So when I say something that really is fun and good news 
that I think should have a typical reaction of oh.....
I don't know say --JOY  
and am met 
with a schizophrenia of reactions,
 I am once again
reminded that parenting is not for the weak.

Me:  "Girls let's check out early today and take your Daddy to lunch
. Won't that be fun"
 Note here:
In my mind it was supposed to be all Little House on the Prarieish.

Happy Mouth(age 15) " Why do we have to check out?
 Let's take the whole day and go shopping
for Dad, I mean."  
 Her eyes are in backpedaling mode at this point

Laid Back Jane (Formerly Rollercoaster at this age of 12):
" I can't check out. Do you know how much homework I will have? 
We are reading and taking a quiz on Despereaux today!! 
What are you thinking?"
The look of horror on her face is equivalent to that of watching a kitten being beaten.

Forrest (8):  " I bet Dad wants us to bring Sissy and my turtle too."
She has a gum drop stuck to the front of her jumper
 and I swear I saw her backpack move just a little.

Then the three of them start talking all at once,
 each of their own dialogue 
and slowly my mind
just hears the teacher from The Peanuts cartoon:

"Wha -wha wha" 
"Wha-wha wha-wha"

Finally I am drawn back to reality as they are all saying "Mama"

ME: "Yes well okay ," 
 "I think today your dad has a lot to do 
so just finish up your lunches because you are going to school today"

Happy Mouth: "Great way to go!" )
(pointing at  Rollercoaster) Now we gotta go to school!"

Rollercoaster: "YES!!!!"  (multiple fist pumps)

Forrest:  (She already has the dog on a leash)
" Okay , Sissy and I are ready!"

Everyone went to school .

 I, however , went to lunch with Mr. Rodgers.

It was Joyful indeed!!


Friday, October 11, 2013

Tools of the Trade

As many know my family and I volunteer with a non profit that provides clean water to people in rural Tanzania. Both my older girls have been to Tanzania twice
. As it just so happens I work at a drilling company .
 Now we were into the giving of wells long before I ever got this job.
 And I am basically a paper pusher here , 
so its not like I'm  learning to drill or 
getting this company to drill in Africa.
(But I'm working my plan)

But this post is not about any of that but rather the daily dose of what I get by working at a place of industry.
And it is an ear opener and a eye poper.


Prepare for laughter and a touch of offense

 I sometimes think my company is its a covert operation for something else.  As I am going through the invoices and purchases orders I see things like "3 in brass nipples", "5 in female couplers" and  "dope was left".  Hmmmm......

I'm not an engineer  so I don't know the lingo- go it.  But the day I walked to the mail box and retrieved a drilling magazine titles "Deep Hole Driller" I really just had to laugh-
Really?  They couldn't think of a more politically correct name?

After awhile I started paying attention to the roughnecks when they turned in payroll and talked logistics with the boss.   


 here are a few lines I have over heard:

"I'm going to need the strippers ASAP on tomorrows platform."

"Use the 1 inch black nipples they cover better"

" Video tape the site and see if the female couplers are leaking"

Now I know a little bit about home improvement and know they describe male/female when something locks together, but I really didn't know the extend of the debauchery.  Here are just a few names used in drilling, electrical and other industries:

butt splicer 
whole spreader
blow off preventer
socket wrench
pike pole
slip joint
male reducers
just to name a few 
and of course the obvious screw, screwdriver and cockpit.

What I am convinced of ,after learning all the terms used in industry, is that the world was indeed established by men . 
Hence all the names and references that they can remember.

And I thought Miley was in the  skank business...

This is some dirty business

Excuse me  I need to shower now.